Couples Counseling vs Relationship Coaching

Early 2021 Alex and I started seeing a couples counselor.

It was one year into the pandemic, we had been living together for 6 months, and things started to get hard. We needed the tools to reinforce the foundation we had been building up to this point.

The honest truth is that Alex had never been in a long term relationship and I was an anxious mess, feeling triggered by my past trauma and unsure how to trust myself to make good decisions. I felt like we were doing life around one another and I knew that if we didn’t get on the same path we would head in separate directions.

Our counselor was amazing - she taught us many principles of healthy relationship dynamics. She taught us how to listen to one another. How to talk about and validate our feelings. How to repair after a fight.

It was a great experience.

And, I still felt extremely anxious. 

I knew that the next stage of our relationship would be engagement and I was terrified. I even told him not to propose during our first vacation together that spring. 

I booked a solo session with our counselor to discuss the matter. She was supportive but I finished the call without any clarity.

And that is because therapy is not coaching - and I needed coaching. 

I needed to learn how to accept Alex for who he is, not who I think he should be.

I needed to learn how not to depend on Alex to make me feel good about myself.

I needed to learn how to recognize my power and access my inner knowing.

Unfortunately I didn’t have this when Alex proposed and it was still a stressful experience for me.

But you know what, I felt amazing on my wedding day nearly two years later, walking down to the aisle to a man I trust completely. 

Coaching made this possible for me.

Coaching made it possible for me to have the perfect wedding and actually enjoy it - I mean how many brides oversleep on their wedding day because they are so relaxed?

Because of coaching our marriage is a safe harbor instead of a battle ground.

Because of coaching we have enough room for both of us to chase our dreams individually and still come back together at the end of each day. 

This is not out of reach for you.

But it does require specific  skills, mindset tools and consistent support to make it happen

I invite you to join me in 1:1 coaching. Your partner doesn’t have to change for your partnership to improve - you just need coaching.